Yes, that’s right, be jealous.
Finally got to meet INRIS today, for lunch, along with Mel (well of course, I know her, duh, but it was fun for the three of us to meet up, a little impromptu bloggy lunch!) and it was fantastic…so great to meet someone that I’ve been following for months, and keeping in touch with by email etc.
What did I learn?
He’s a genuine, good guy.
And he’s happy.
And he’s moving forward.
And that makes all the difference in the world, if you ask me. If you can pick yourself up, dust yourself off and just get through the tough spots, it makes a hell of a difference.
I sit here and while I may have my own stresses (the usual money woes, work woes, and more seriously, Nala woes), it is encouraging to see a friend come out of difficult situation already for the better, even though there’s still much more ahead for him.
I neglected to take a picture – of course, realized it as I was driving back to work – but I will say that we had a great time, and if he lived in this neck of the woods, I’m sure we’d be great “IRL” friends as well. Have a blast during the rest of your trip, INRIS, and thanks for the fantastic parting gift (a lovely bottle of wine…that I will most definitely crack open with Mel and cheers to you, and towards the ability to move forward).
Onward friends!
~~
One thing INRIS said that really resonated with me was this – what’s great about those he (and I) follow that are going through divorce or break-ups is that they learn, they get stronger and they don’t wallow.
It’s food for thought, and it’s something I’ll probably blog about more in coming weeks. Not to say that I am a wallower per se, but I think I have allowed myself more down moments than usual (which isn’t always bad…you need to feel what you feel before you can release them) related to dating, finding love, money woes (sensing a theme?!) and general bumps and bruises from life.
Because, at the end of the day…life’s pretty damn good and sometimes I need a slap of reality to realize that. I saw that today…so thank you, INRIS…’til we meet again.
June 11, 2010 at 4:18 am
So glad you guys enjoyed your lunch.
June 11, 2010 at 7:50 am
We did – it was fun
June 11, 2010 at 8:35 am
I love that: “they learn, they get stronger and they don’t wallow.” It’s so true and important of any struggles we go through in our lives – we’re better off when we learn and stop wallowing.
June 11, 2010 at 8:41 am
Exactly! I loved that. Hope you’re having a fab last day of vaca!
June 11, 2010 at 9:18 am
I’m a bit jealous you guys got to meet up, to be honest! Glad you enjoyed yourselves and happy wine drinking!
June 11, 2010 at 9:36 am
Aw! Where do you live (if you don’t wanna say, that’s ok!)…we all gotta plan a meet-up sometime…would be a blast.
June 11, 2010 at 10:46 am
Rochester, NY… Where are you if you don’t mind sharing?
June 11, 2010 at 10:47 am
oh that’s not too bad…we could figure something out at some point – fun – I’m near Boston.
June 11, 2010 at 11:04 am
for me, the hardest part is the acceptance of the new normal. for so long, i was miserable in my marriage, but there was a safety and a security in it that i don’t have anymore. and the thing is, that’s hard to get used to. it’s hard to build that basic acceptance that there’s no one waiting for you at home, that if you want love you must subject yourself to the dating game, and that you’re financially alone. it is truly difficult not to succumb to self pity and sorrow sometimes.
i’m getting there, though. i try to concentrate on what i’ve gained from my divorce: self confidence, control over my life, stronger bonds with friends and family, a rockin’ social life and a chance at real love.
<3
June 11, 2010 at 11:09 am
You’re right – the new normal is VERY hard to adjust to and for it to feel just “normal” and not “new.” It is difficult not to succumb to sorrow sometimes, and I think it’s fair and OKAY to do so, as long as you are able to pick yourself up and move forward, too ya know? And it sounds like you are doing that too. Thanks for your note and two cents…love that you are reading
June 11, 2010 at 12:22 pm
I AM jealous! Someday, as god as my witness, I will be in the Boston area and will also get have lunch/dinner/drinks/hijinks with you and Mel.
Awesome that you got to meet INRIS IRL. Aren’t the interwebs something? Imagine two random people from opposite coasts meeting based merely on their need to tell strangers about their failed marriage? Amazing.
One bone to pick, though: I may learn, and I may get strong, but I still want to reserve the right to wallow!
June 11, 2010 at 12:51 pm
Of COURSE you are allowed to wallow…just not every other word, hope it didn’t come across that way (for the record, you aren’t a wallow IMO). And I’m glad SOMEONE is jealous…just kidding, but I’d love to meet up with you too, especially as my very first bloggy friend!!
And good point on this: Imagine two random people from opposite coasts meeting based merely on their need to tell strangers about their failed marriage? Amazing. <– so true.
June 11, 2010 at 12:38 pm
I hear he smells kinda funny…
June 11, 2010 at 12:51 pm
LOL…well I didn’t wanna mention it…kidding
June 12, 2010 at 8:11 pm
How cool you got to meet INRIS in person. I think it’s quite adventurous and you’re inspiring me. I’m going to meet Bucksome Boomer in July and Kristi from Divorce to Happiness is coming to Colorado and I’m hoping to meet her too.
Sorry to read about Nayla – how’s she doing?
June 13, 2010 at 8:35 am
It was a lot of fun! Glad to help inspire you to do the same…if I’m ever in Colorado, I’d love to meet (and vice versa if you ever make your way to Boston!). Nala is doing pretty well, thanks for asking. She’s eating lots and is pretty active. Hoping that’s a good sign.
June 14, 2010 at 2:01 pm
I am jealous! I love meeting bloggy friends!
June 14, 2010 at 2:27 pm
it was a blast, we’ll have to meet up sometime…ya know, in Dallas or something
September 6, 2010 at 3:03 pm
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