But you need to line up (and I take bribes). My interview was today!
I was a little nervous beforehand, not sure why, I live and breathe “the situation” and my life daily! (mental note: I’m going to have to come up with a new name for “the situation” – because it’s no longer “the situation” to me. This is my life, and I daresay, that “situation” is turning into one of the best things that could have happened, I am thinking…).
Anyway, it was a great discussion, and some of the things I shared, I hadn’t really verbalized before, nor had I really realized that’s how I felt. Mandy asked me if becoming more independent (something I said was probably one of my – if not my biggest – achievements) was purposeful…and I hadn’t really thought of it that way before, so I don’t know if it WAS purposeful THEN, but it IS purposeful now. Even though I have days where I get down about being alone, or get a smidge lonely, there are days – like today – that I just cherish. I’m sitting here, with a glass of wine, the Red Sox in the background (soon to be So you think you can dance – one of my guilty pleasures…probably because I can’t dance to save my life!!) and um, that’s it. Nobody talking to me, nobody bothering me, nothing. It’s great. It really helps me center myself, reset for the next day and just “be.”
I also found myself a little nostalgic after the interview (can’t wait for it to post BTW!) and thinking towards d-day on 9/11. I’m afraid I might cry during the court session, for some reason, just because the magnitude of what is taking place is hitting me, and will hit me smack in the face then, too. And I don’t want to cry, not because I am trying to be strong and proud and hold it in, but because I am not weak, I am not sad so much about it ending, because I do want and NEED that closure, but just because it’s the end of a huge era in my life. Ten years. TEN years. That’s one-third of my life. Door shut. Just an odd feeling.
But alas, I am rambling again. Life goes on…