Just had to squeeze in a second post today. Had a few revelations in the last day or so, and just needed to get it out on paper. Sometimes I feel as though I can express myself and/or verbalize what I am feeling by writing it out on my blog, than talking through it. Interesting side benefit of sorts for me, on blogging!

Anyway, I had date #4 with “the Russian” last night (long story short – I was originally going to get together with boy #9 last night – brainy blonde – but shifted that to this weekend, in favor of date #4…it turned out to work out pretty well and I didn’t feel quite as though I was shafting boy #9 because he was actually relieved when I asked if we could get together this weekend, as he had a lot to do pre-Thanksgiving anyway).

We got together last night because he’s off to see his family through early next week, so he came over for dinner and we watched a movie. I was a little ambivalent about how the night would go, worried that it could go the way boy #7 went (worried it was more about the physical, than actually wanting to see me/learn more about me etc), but it was actually a fairly good combination of both (as mentioned, there is good chemistry with “the Russian” as evidenced last night!), but I came to a conclusion afterwards. I don’t really think it will go much farther than some one-off dates. We are really looking for different things and it sort of hit me last night. I suddenly, at the end of the night, wasn’t as drawn to him as I was when the night began (we had fun, don’t get me wrong), and could see more clearly that he seems to want more casual dating, which I knew going into this, and I’m finding that more and more, I am looking towards relationship material more than casual dating.

We also don’t have a ton in common – he sleeps in till noon, my idea of sleeping in is usually 7:30 or 8 am! He thinks women want men to be their best friend – his priority appears to more on the physical side than the friendship/companionship side. He has more of an edge to him, a little “rough and tough” – I’m more of a “nice girl.” And I’m not saying that my conclusions here are the be-all and end-all, or that they are totally accurate, but that’s the gist of it – we tend to see things opposite in most cases (I just gave two examples, but there are others). While “opposites attract” I do think there needs to be a happy medium.

So, that’s a long-winded way of saying that I’m not sure how much farther this will go with “the Russian” – I won’t rule out another date, but I won’t let it fester on if I’m not feeling it anymore. And, the funny thing is, when I came to that realization – that he isn’t “it” (sorta had that feeling anyway, in the back of my mind) – I suddenly thought about boy #9 more optimistically, because he has that combination I am looking for more – smart, funny, a “thinker,” nice, active – and the only unknown is chemistry. So, we’ll see how that goes, but I am looking forward to finding out more.

I’m still looking for my “just right” but at this point, I am having fun finding that out…whether it takes one date or five dates, I’ll find it – or he’ll find me – it just takes time. And I’m okay with that.

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