Even if divorce isn’t your choice, it can become the best thing that has ever happened to you.
THAT is divorce has taught me this year.
As I flip back to my very first few blog posts (started Feb 21), I was already heading towards that realization, though I don’t think it became quite a revelation until much later in the year. I’d say this summer, just before I started dating, was when I realized, 100%, that this was what was MEANT to happen to me, and I wasn’t a victim, and I wasn’t being punished, and I am living the life I was meant to live.
To me, that’s pretty powerful, considering going through a divorce has the tendency to break people down emotionally, sometimes for years, sometimes never to quite heal from it. In my case, I do feel fortunate as my divorce wasn’t the result of cheating, or abuse, or anything extremely hurtful. I’m also fortunate that there were no children involved and, that Pete and I are still friends – and good friends at that.
The realization that divorce has been the best thing to happen to me was also solidifed when Pete told me he made a mistake, a few weeks ago. When he told me he thought this WAS the best thing to happen to me – his admitting that, and seeing that from afar – that meant a lot, and not just because I do still value his opinion to an extent, but because I think, in a way, he was hoping he’d have his a-aha moment by now (which I’m not sure he has).
I feel phenomenal. I feel hopeful. I feel like 2010 is going to be a year of victory, further awakening and breakthroughs, and it will put even more distance between me and the year that was, for all intents and purposes, transitional. I made a lot of changes this year, some out of necessity (moving), some out of want, and I want to keep changing and growing, because complacency is not anything I’d like to become.
I hope everyone has a wonderful new year’s eve tonight, and I promise to post some thoughts tomorrow on resolutions (that is, if I’ve solidified mine by that point!). Cheers to 2010 – to the proverbial “me” year (proverbial for ALL of us separated/divorced/singles out there – it is OUR YEAR! I can feel it!!) – *clink*