I was catching up on some of New Beginnings’ blog posts and one of hers sparked a post idea for me (funny, she recently mentioned my “is there just one person for you” post!) – what DO you do with the “stuff” from your marriage?

This feels like an off-the-beaten path post for me since I actually haven’t written much about my divorce and past marriage much these days (a little ironic since my blog was born out of chronicling my life leading into- and post-divorce, but also fitting, since my blog is evolving as the time goes on), but I do struggle with this concept a bit.

Why?

For a couple of reasons. Part of me doesn’t want to just throw away our wedding album, for example, (which was pretty small, not overly fancy, since we were married so simply anyway, in Hawaii, alone) because well, the pictures are beautiful, the scenery is breathtaking, and it was an amazing time, a time in my life that I actually don’t want to forget. There are still songs that bring me right back to certain spots on our trip, and even when it all comes rushing back, I’m not sad, I’m actually happy, because, for what it was, it was beautiful.

As for our wedding rings and my engagement ring? Well, that’s been a bit of a struggle for me, personally. For some reason, when I look at them (and I don’t look at them often whatsoever), I get sad, and I can’t look at them any longer. Yet I have been adamant about keeping them (Pete has been fine with that, though he doesn’t quite understand why I want to, and to be honest, neither do I). Though lately, I have been thinking about the best way to preserve what they mean to me yet not have them be a constant reminder of what they once signified.

…I’m thinking (if Pete agrees, and I think he will, as we’ve discussed this in passing) of turning my ring into another ring…a ME ring. A nice bauble that is me…not sure what stone I want (depends on what we get for the trade-in I suppose!) but something that signifies my individuality and independence. That feels like the only fitting way to celebrate what the ring once signified (in a way), while also celebrating the me I am now. And at the same time, it won’t feel like a constant reminder of the past.

We’ll see. I’m still toying with it, but it does seem like the best way to turn in what once was, and move forward with what is now.  Me.

(and my fingers feel naked, they need a bauble!) 🙂

What about you…my divorced, or soon-to-be divorced friends. Did you get rid of your “stuff” or did you store it away? My guess is that those that had rocky marriages/divorces got rid of their stuff, but I’m curious either way.

And for me, I’m eternally grateful that I am in the place I am emotionally and mentally post-divorce. It’s something I’ll never take for granted and it’s something that will always be a part of me, but for the best.

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