I had an interesting exchange with someone last week, where the question basically was, ‘who is your Mr. Right? Do you (still) see Pete as that person?” (I’m paraphrasing)

I was admittedly stumped. Not because I see Pete as Mr. Right, because I don’t, I see him as my best friend at this point, someone that “gets” me still, and understands me almost more than anyone in my life, but because I still am not very good at vocalizing what my Mr. Right is.

Is that okay?

I think so.

But I feel as though at this point, after almost a full year of dating, of dating all sorts of different types, ages, personalities, that I’d know exactly what I’m looking for. I know certainly what I don’t want, and I know some parts of what I do want, but I don’t know what the right “package” looks like in full. (I write about this topic a lot, I realize, but I think it’s all part of the journey, and it’s healthy. I’m a thinker. I ask, I question, I wonder. Sometimes it leads to overthinking, but that’s me! 😉 )

And for some reason, I feel as though I’m expected to, or that I should know. And I’m probably putting unnecessary pressure on myself to “know” who that person is, because I still firmly believe that you’ll know when you’re supposed to know, and nobody’s advice, two cents, past experience can help me, sway me, or persuade me otherwise (nor should it, honestly. While I appreciate, embrace and love all of the feedback and advice I get here and IRL, sometimes some things are just meant for ME to know and go by, and this is one of them, I think. It’s one of those things each of us individually knows, void of anyone else’s input).

I just know I haven’t yet found it yet.

But that’s okay. Really, it is. (And for those of you wondering about OKC boy #3 aka Southern Boy, the jury’s still out on that one. We’ll see if/when I see him again what conclusions I can draw from being with him and my observations on how I feel with him. Stay tuned.)

So I leave you with U2’s “Still haven’t found what I’m looking for” – captures parts of what I’m feeling, and parts of what I want to feel – the want/need/love/affection for someone. Something I haven’t truly felt yet…and something for another post, perhaps tomorrow

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And for those of you asking about Nala, thank you again so much. She’s been doing well this weekend, and I continue to feed her as much as she wants. She’s active, seems more vibrant, will know more tomorrow when I talk to the vet as well. But thank you for all of the support, kind words and prayers.

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