Bear with me this evening on some random Monday musings, shall we?

Um, my sister Jen’s baby shower is in SIX DAYS (next Sunday). For about 50 people. At a cute hall by the ocean. Ack. No pressure or anything 😉

In all seriousness, I don’t feel uber stressed about it, in part because I’ve got my auntie throwdown partners in crime (my sister Jess and Jen’s sister-in-law Jackie) as well as my mom joining forces to make this a shower to remember. I mean, it is the very first niece for the three of us (I think for Jackie too?) and the first grandchild and great-grandchild in my family. It’s gotta be fabulous, right?

And us sisters…well, we know how to throw a party (Jen’s bridal shower, I must say, was the best, most non-traditional shower ever…in my backyard at my former house, poolside, in August, and it was fabulous! To this day, a day/night I will remember forever…and I hate bridal showers! Normally, that is, and definitely not those of my sister’s, of course!). So, I hope it goes well, and we don’t forget anything, like oh, tablecloths (almost did forget those when shopping tonight!), or, oh, the food (okay, seriously, if we forgot to pick up the food, we may have major issues, but I digress…).

Stay tuned for pics and an update next weekend, fo sho!

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Have been having a riveting side conversation with Diary of a Divorced Guy on dating, and how much of dating is all about looks.

Sadly, I hate to say that I think in this day and age, with the amount of online dating and social networking sites running rampant, it’s hard for it *not* to be one of the first reactions you have when you view a profile, re-connect with an old friend/flame/college acquaintance etc.

Why?

Well, it’s just the first thing you see – a picture.

And especially with dating sites, where you click through pages and pages of people, it’s hard not to toss those aside that may not have the best smile or body or looks or hair or whatever floats your boat. Sometimes I think it would almost be better if dating sites didn’t lead with a picture, but with a profile, so you rule out those that don’t have the same things in common, or whose words may be offputting.

Whenever I am in online dating mode – I try to weigh them both together as much as possible. What they say, a little about how they look  (I’d be lying if I said it didn’t matter at all) and a lot about whether initially, they fall into where I am in my life, and my must-have’s in a man (which of course, still changes quite often…but that’s relatively normal, right?). But I wonder how many people actually don’t put looks first, and just go for the hottest one they see first. How can any of us be successful at dating if everyone’s going for the ‘extreme’ end of the spectrum and not the happy medium? Maybe a rhetorical question for another day…

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This leads me to baggage.

And I’ve probably mentioned this before, but does the label “divorce” scream “baggage! baggage! get out! run! alert! alert!” when you’re dating? Either online or meeting someone at a bar or whereever? Does it matter more if a woman is divorced or a man? Is it worth bringing up on a first date? Prior to? Or a wait-and-see approach?

For me, I’ve always been super open about it because my thing is…if they’re going to run at the first mention of the big ‘D,’ then they clearly aren’t right for me, or me for them (if they’re going to make a snap judgement either!). But I do think there is something to be said for double standards…I tend to get the impression from my past dating experiences that being a woman divorced is more of a “red flag” than for a man. Maybe it’s just me and I’m overreacting, but curious what your viewpoints are on that, if you two are divorced and dating? Thoughts?

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See – lots swirling in the brain tonight…nothing to truly lose sleep over, per se, but just some things I’ve been pondering (and in the case of Jen’s shower, am just super excited about!)…and it’s Monday, that’s about all I got in my brain right now. Perhaps a sign of a hectic week to come. Hrhmm.

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