Oh match.com, this is already somewhat humorous (and when I really just want to be frustrated by rejection/radio silence, sometimes you just have to laugh!). I know I’m probably one of many women (or men, I suppose for that matter) that gets a lot of random responses on match.com or other dating sites, but wow, I’ve had a few doozies in relatively few days since rejoining match.com.

Let’s discuss, shall we? What peeves me?

Guys who “wink” at me (generally, I hate this. I know it’s the name of the game sometimes, especially with those that aren’t subscribers, but if you are, just send an email. I mean really).


Guys with mugshot-like pictures that wink at me – check out this doozy. Seriously, dude? How on earth did you ever think this was a *good* picture, first of all and second, you’re about 15 years older than me. Notsomuch.

Creeper!! *shudder*

What else peeves me? Bad grammar. And I don’t mean one or two words spelled wrong or a run-on sentence or two. That can be forgiven, but when your entire email and profile are one run-on sentence filled with typos, incorrect word usage etc., that just screams “no” to me. Here’s an example, so you don’t think I’m being snotty about writing (given it’s what I do on a daily basis):

I gess when you look at it that way I a very lucky to have the day off cus I work out side installing lawn sprinklers. It’s just temporary until I get back to school for hvac. What happened was I left the job I’m at to go work at jordans fernicher so that I can work year round and go to school but I got hit by a car and needed to go on lite duty work so this all happened when the economy crashed so that yoused it as a excuse to get rid of me. I looked for work for a year and couldn’t find work that would even pay my what I was getting from unemployment so I went back to my old job.
I have lived on my own since I was 17 I never had any help I always seam to find a way to get by even if it means living in a studio apartment and not getting 40 hr of work every week but ill find a good job that will pay for a apartment and allow me to go to school What kind of outdoor fun do you enjoy doing

Really? And this guy emailed me probably 5-6 times (I responded once, because I wanted to give him the benefit of the doubt and said “holy typos, were you typing on a blackberry?! And he said he was, so I figured – phew, maybe not so bad. But then I got a barrage of others that were like this, or worse. And really, we had nothing in common either, so that was the end of that).

Or, how about the guy that emailed me, and then emailed me again a few days later, with virtually the same email, but without realizing he’d already emailed me? How many women do you email this little song and dance to, sir? You *do* know you can check your sent mail, right?! Here’s what he had to say (twice):

hi jo,
I really enjoyed reading your profile and “ok” your pic also got my attention but it looks like we have alot in common so just giving this a shot 🙂 Looking to retire from this online dating hell… JK lol Basicly seeing if u will check out my profile and see that I am “just a nice guy” and that I have alot to offer. I’m looking for a nice girl who likes to have fun, be spontaneous, likes to go out but also quite nights at home 🙂 I know I have some baggage but who doesn’t right? But my kids are not baggage as they are wonderful . Hope to talk to u soon. Danny

First of all, don’t call me Jo. You don’t know me. That’s reserved for my friends and family etc, mmk? And second of all, you go right into this being “online dating hell” – so pray tell, how long *have* you been on here? Because I seem to recall the same email from you not just a few days ago, but um, last YEAR when I was on this very dating site. Pass.

I hope you’re all laughing, because hey, these are kind of funny, and sure, could be a lot worse. On the upside, there are a few potentials, including one that I may see when I get back from vacation. He’s also 30, just ran a half marathon and is doing a full marathon in October (damn, I give anyone credit for running a full marathon, like whoa!), seems driven, happy, a thinker, animal-lover, and says things like “take care” at the end of his emails. Hey, I dig that.

So, we’ll see what happens, with him, and a couple of others . And seriously, creepers with mughsots NEED. NOT. APPLY. EVER.  That is all.