So, apparently, there are a few of these in the pipeline for this week, but I am SO excited that the first part of my SinceMyDivorce interview posted today on Mandy’s blog. The focus of this post is my fear of living alone when Pete and I first separated – it was almost unbearable to be alone in the house, especially during the dark, dreary months of winter.

Here is an excerpt (check out Mandy’s blog for the rest!):

I had never lived alone. I’m a triplet so my sisters and I have always been really close. We’ve done everything together and then we grew into relationships. So I shifted from being very close to my sisters to being very close with a boyfriend and then husband and never really being on my own.

I didn’t even like sleeping in the house by myself and that was before my ex moved out. I hated it. His family lives two states away and every few months he would go visit them. Sometimes I would go and sometimes I would stay home but I would dread those weekends because I hated being by myself. I hated being alone. I hated sleeping alone. I didn’t even like being in the house on my own during the day. That was probably the most daunting, scary part of the divorce. I didn’t know how to be alone. I didn’t know how to enjoy it.

As I’ve posted before, I cherish my alone time now, and feel more balanced and refreshed when I can have some time to myself to regroup for the next day’s activities. Funny how things can shift so dramatically when you’re forced to react to a situation that you’ve always feared, isn’t it?

~~

PS – I hit 9,000 hits last night – I don’t quite know how the numbers are spiking so much, but in looking at my blog stats, the hits look pretty legit, which is awesome. Keep it comin!

Advertisements

I did it. I made my very first attempt at grilling all by myself. And I didn’t singe my eyebrows, or burn the chicken, or set anything on fire.

bq_guy

Now, this may not seem like a big deal, but I’ve never grilled before, as Pete always did that. And, since I LOVE the grill, I really wanted to learn to grill. Today was my first attempt and it was a huge success – delicious grilled barbecue chicken! I feel like a “big girl” now. Again, it may be strange to some, but this feels like yet another big step for me in being self-sufficient and really being on my own.

Go me, go me, go me 😉

I’m living alone. Okay, no duh, of course I am…but tonight as I was making dinner and feeding my kitties, it just sort of hit me…I’m living alone and I have been living alone since sometime on November, and I’m doing it. Seems so simplistic, but for those of you that don’t know me, living alone and me do NOT mix. I’ve never lived alone. Ever. And I’ve never wanted to. So when this happened, and I was forced to live alone, it just felt so daunting. And I know I have mentioned how I’m adjusting to living alone and all that jazz, but I guess I am feeling at a point where I know I can do it. I still don’t love it, but there are more pros than cons to it now and I think that’s all I need right now.

Now back to some peace and quiet and kitties purring 😉

So, I think I am really getting used to living alone…note – big difference between LIKING to live alone and getting used to it. I like parts of it, I really do, and I think the pending springtime is helping boost my mood a bit too, makes me really look forward to spring and then SUMMER! My favorite time of year by a long stretch.

I guess what I like about living alone is having my own space and doing things at my own pace. I never realized I liked that or wanted that either, but I am learning more and more about myself and things that maybe I pushed aside in the past. And, I’ve never lived alone, only lived with a roommate for a year, so the whole living alone/living without a man in my life is a whole new adjustment, and in a way, I dig it.

..still hate sleeping alone though. Big ‘fraidycat 😉 (yes, this was meant to be sort of a non-post today – fun, but not really uber thoughtful either, just a mini relevation!).